Sometimes life stinks

The boy and his dog, in less stinky times

No, this is not going to be a post about how bad life can be. I mean that title literally. Sometimes, life smells really bad.

I live in a house with two athletically-inclined males. They play basketball outside in 90 degree heat. They play hockey – and they play hard. So I’m used to them coming in the house smelling terrible. And then they empty their hockey bags and it gets even worse. And even though I’m a delicate female (everyone who knows me personally can stop laughing now. No really, stop now.) I too can be smelly at times. For instance, when I came home from Boy Scout Wood Badge weekend last Sunday night after being at camp for 3 full days and wearing full uniform most of the time, I may have smelled a little bad. Maybe just a little.

I also live in a house with 2 dogs and a cat. No matter how well you try to train them and how much you clean up after them, there will occasionally be a smelly mess to contend with. And then there’s that cucumber that was forgotten in the back of the bottom crisper drawer of the fridge. One day everything is fine, the next you open the door to get some creamer for your coffee in the morning and you swear something died in there.

All that to say I’m fairly used to encountering less than pleasant aromas. None of that prepared me for last night though. Because last night, Macy, Wildman’s 7 month old beagle, got sprayed by a skunk. Now we smell skunk on a pretty regular basis – they are running around the neighborhood pretty often and we see them in the yard. I knew it was going to happen one of these days. But when you have to carry a just-sprayed dog in your house it’s a whole different story.

I tried to prevent the incident, but obviously failed. I didn’t know this stubby little dog could get over our little “dog-fence” so fast. I did manage to get Gabby – our much more obedient dog – to come in the house when I first spotted the skunk. But no sooner than I saw the offending critter, I saw Macy’s little butt chasing right after it.

I guess I should mention here that it was 9:30 at night, Wildman was in bed and Kev was walking out the door to work. I was barefoot and not at all prepared to go chasing Macy around the neighborhood in the dark. Fortunately she hadn’t gone very far and I caught up with her in the neighbor’s yard. Unfortunately, she stunk.

I’ve never had a dog get sprayed. I had no idea what to do first. I couldn’t get her to follow me back to our yard so I had no choice but to pick her up and carry her home. So now we both smelled like skunk. Then once we were home I had to figure out what to do. I had to contain her somehow and the only way I could think of was to put her in the dog crate – which happens to be in my bedroom. Then I immediately did what I always do when I don’t know what to do – I Googled. I knew that the old tomato juice bath wasn’t necessarily the best option (and also knew I didn’t have any tomato juice) and I knew there had to be other things that worked. I found a recipe for a remedy that called for 1 qt of hydrogen peroxide, baking soda and dish soap. Of course, there was no peroxide to be found in my house. So then I did what I always do when I need something and I don’t have it – I called my neighbor, Tante T. She had just pulled in the driveway from work, and low and behold she had a whole quart of peroxide.

To make this long story a little shorter, I let the Wildman get out of bed (he had been awakened by all the chaos) and with him handing me things from a distance I was able to bathe Macy in the kitchen sink. We dried her off, threw away the bed that was in the dog crate when I first threw her in there, and then put her in the crate for the night. I stunk, my bedroom stunk, and I had to throw away not only the dog bed but a towel, a dish cloth, Macy’s collar and my shirt. I reassured the Wildman that his dog was fine, just wet and a little scared. Truth be told, I think we were all a bit traumatized. I got Wildman back in bed, grabbed a blanket and was so exhausted that I was asleep on the 30 year old couch in the bonus room within half an hour.

This morning the house and dog seem to be less stinky. I’ll probably be bathing her at least one more time today, and we have to get a new collar and dog bed. But it could be worse I guess. And I have another life experience I can now check off my list.


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